Aching for Life

I haven't made up my mind about the different baby-sleep philosophies. So far I've mostly tread the path of least resistance, both for Zeke and for me. After his first month, during which he could sleep anywhere and everywhere, he has mostly napped in the baby carrier while I ran errands and did chores during the day. At night now, he sleeps in the bassinet for the first half of the night and then in bed with us for the second after his middle-of-the-night feeds during which I inevitably fall asleep. I've started to try let him take naps in the bassinet too - starting with his last nap of the day, around 6. I'm slowly inching towards a schedule, knowing this will help structure life for everyone (but really just inching). And I'm going to try more naps in the bassinet soon. But today, while I was walking around EV with him sound asleep in the carrier, I thought about how both long and short these three months have felt - how hard it is when he is in a fit of cry...

Here is a selection of my favorite moments of my boys from the past month. Sharing a laugh Homeboys Excited to cuddle Buddies with Gund bear at 10 weeks Zeke is a morning person. He laughs the most after breakfast. Zeke gets his expressive eyebrows from Ryan In July, Ryan tore his ACL and Zeke got three shots - a shot of my poor bandaged boys. Ryan got Zeke to start loving making faces at the mirror. How we have our meals now - taking turns holding Zeke!

A Child in the Night The child stares at the stars. He does not know Their names, He does not care. Time halts for him And he is standing on the earth's far rim , As all the sky surrenders it's bright show. He will not feel like this again until He falls in love. He will not be possessed By dispossession till he has caressed A face and in its eyes seen stars stand still. Elizabeth Jennings

"Remember, therefore, it is not thy hold of Christ that saves thee—it is Christ; it is not thy joy in Christ that saves thee—it is Christ; it is not even faith in Christ, though that be the instrument—it is Christ’s blood and merits; therefore, look not so much to thy hand with which thou art grasping Christ, as to Christ; look not to thy hope, but to Jesus, the source of thy hope; look not to thy faith, but to Jesus, the author and finisher of thy faith. We shall never find happiness by looking at our prayers, our doings, or our feelings; it is what Jesus is, not what we are, that gives rest to the soul."  - Charles Spurgeon Over the last two months, because I spend most of my days in the house and because my academic obligations are on hold, my hours and minutes pass slowly - from one feeding to the next, from one diaper to the next from one nap (attempt) to the next.  I've come to judge whether a day has been "go...